This Is My Year

I'm back!!! And I've missed blogging, but I'm not going to lie - I definitely enjoyed the refreshing time away where I could just relax at night, reflect on what's happened in my life, recharge and not have to sit at my computer. But after the break, it also feels good to be back.

There is no denying it, the past year has been pretty brutal for my family. I know I've talked a lot about it, but this is my life. It is what I experienced and talking about it on here helps me to process everything. Ask either Tolar or I and we will tell you that it has been our toughest year of marriage so far. Its shocking to me to think that we have already faced a tough year in marriage, being that we haven't even been married for five years. But that is the hand that we were dealt and I'm incredibly happy to say that God not only brought us through our tough times, but He brought us through everything TOGETHER. I've talked a lot about how I knew God had a plan for us and He has definitely revealed that He never let go of us. But even though I trusted in God and had faith that He would help beauty to rise from the ashes, it was still hard. We were brought to our knees on more occasions than we ever imagined, faced burdens and hurdles and just plain unfairness. Through it all, we fought hard to keep standing and we won!

Now as we start a new calendar year, I've been looking back on everything that happened to us in 2014. For me in 2015, I'm only allowing myself to focus on the positives. Yep, the pain was real, life was scary and it downright sucked being ripped away from our friends and our church. But there is so much more joy that came out of our pain.

Had Tolar not lost his job, he would not have been able to spend every day with Baby K, watching her grow and change and make new discoveries. It isn't lost on us that a lot of Dads miss so much while they are at work.

Had we not moved, we wouldn't have been given the amazing gift of time. Time with my parents and aunt because we live right down the street. More time with each other because we aren't sitting in traffic every time we leave the house. More time with Tolar's side of the family and my sister's family too because our schedules aren't as packed and we have plenty of time for monthly visits. It is the greatest blessing to see our families enjoying our daughter.

Had we not left DC Metro Church, we wouldn't have been blessed to help launch Lifeline Church. This church made us come alive when we felt like we were losing a part of ourselves. I can't fully speak for Tolar on this, but I felt like when we had to leave DC Metro Church that I was going to lose my identity. It was there that I learned who I am in Christ and learned what a real relationship with Him feels like. And Lifeline Church restored that. We have met the most amazing people, we serve with a Pastor and his family who show us first-hand what servants' hearts look like and have experienced miracles.

Had we not moved to Dublin, Virginia we never would have met Brad and Jessi. These are the first friends we made when we moved to the area and it is actually kind of scary just how similar our stories are. God is so awesome! He placed all of us in each other's lives so that we could have someone who truly understood everything we were going through. To let us know that He had not forgotten about us. With all of our transitions, we haven't gotten to spend as much time with them as we would like, but hey that is what 2015 is for!

Had Tolar not lost his job, he would be stuck in a job that he absolutely despises. What a blessing this time is for Tolar to be able to go back to school and completely change careers. And I have to brag on him and tell you that he got a 4.0 his first semester back in school. I'm so proud of Tolar and all that he has accomplished!

There is so much good that came out of our sadness. And that my friends is what I will remember as I move on to 2015. This will be my year, our year.